I'm going to just cut to the chase: I got totally fried at the beach this past Saturday. No body part was spared, with the only white skin left being the outline of my (super-cute retro polka-dot J. Crew) bikini.
For those who have never seen me in person, it should be noted that I am exceptionally fair-skinned, and burn easily. Twenty minutes outside in the summer with no sunscreen means I am already starting to crisp. I personally know a decent amount of people with similar skin tones and tendencies towards sunburn. Yet I often feel as if I am the one single fair-skinned person in the entire universe, because from a very early age, I have been subjected to the most asinine of questions and commentary from people in my own extended family to classmates to people I've never even met before. Whether I like it or not, the topic of my skin color is apparently always open for discussion. Some gems I've heard along the way include:
"Do you not like going outside? Is that why you're so fair?"
No. I'm fair because I'm Caucasian with mostly Northern European ancestry. Do you dislike going outside? Because that might explain why you're retarded.
"Do you wear, like, SPF 100?"
And this is important information because ... oh right. It's not.
"Your legs are really white"
I'm not sure what color you expected them to be, but they typically match the rest of my body. Thanks for pointing that out, though.
"You're probably the whitest person in this class"*
Now, let's guess who's the biggest asshole!
*No word of a lie, this comment came from a teacher when I was a senior in high school, in front of the rest of the class, no less.
"You look like a porcelain doll"
Except I'm a living human being and I can't be had for six easy payments of $9.99. Though in this person's defense, I think she meant it as a compliment.
"I like that white creamy type"
Lucky me.
In a nutshell, I'm either being criticized for my fair skin, or fetish-ized. Neither of those sentiments are appreciated, especially when I can't sleep on my back, or sit comfortably on the couch, or even wear a slim-fitting shirt because my skin hurts. I'm in pain; isn't that enough? Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some aloe to apply.
1 hour ago
5 comments:
as a fellow fair-skinned person, i feel your pain. at some point almost every summer i experience the inevitable sunburn from, as you said, the 20 minutes i was outside without sunblock. it sucks :(
once at the sand castle contest, i got so burned i went to the first aid place to ask them what i should do...i had 45 sunblock on that i was reapplying but was on a medication that made me even more sensitive to the sun than i already am...you should ask john about it...my skin was pretty much blistering
Oh no, how awful! :o(
Lol! Oh I'm on the other side of the sun vs. skin spectrum (olive skin) and manage to get priceless gems for commentary also! Like oh I didn't know YOUR skin burned. It kinda makes me feel inadequate for not having superhuman Latin-mutated melanin:( Nope just ordinary genes here - great post!
sorry :-/
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